Mitzi's Story

This is Mitzi’s story – the remarkable way a friend showed up for her, a grieving widow, over a cup of tea.

Mitzi had lost her husband unexpectedly about six months before she visited her friend Susan. And she was trying to make her way through the storm of her grief while trying to be both Mom and Dad for her 14-year old daughter, Delaine.

As Mitzi put it “being widowed at 41 is a lot different than being widowed at 80. When you’re young, you’re still planning your tomorrows. We were only married 17 years. We were planning what we were going to do with the next 17 years.”

Susan took Mitzi’s hand and said “I see how busy you’re keeping yourself, but how are you really doing?”

Mitzi broke into tears and confided “there are moments when I literally can’t breathe. I feel like I’m having a heart attack.”

Susan stopped her and said, “You’re having panic attacks.” She explained that she also had panic attacks when her mother died.

Mitzi said Susan helped her finally connect the dots with panic attacks and after that day Mitzi created strategies to help her overcome them. She swam, ran, bicycled and did yoga. She also learned to breathe through these attacks.

Mitzi said Susan had no idea what that conversation meant to her – but on that day Mitzi was able to stand tall and tell herself “I’m going to figure this out.” On that day Mitzi was able to identify the problem and have the conviction that she would work through it.

It’s amazing what women can do for one another when they ask each other: How are you really doing?